Wednesday 30 September 2015

Cold lips and Hot necks

[Animals love us, too] Croxt:

I have kissed the neck of a giraffe and to be honest, you have to be tall enough to reach that high. I bet you've disappointed yourself before but it is how we deal with our problems that seal any further that would be coming our way. So tune your fine mind to the tune of your soul and start scoring magnificent goals. "Oh, whatta goaallll!" A beautiful game. And it's the nature of our planet to help us find ourselves. That's what we are here for. So do not let the noises calm your fears. Let the afraid talk; they always do that. But rise with the eagles and dance with the gazelles. Roar like the lions and be wise as the serpents. Who taught the monkeys how to climb? So even in the advice I have given, I have found mine hidden inside it. So let's not be afraid to guide. The noises of the mother lead te cub. And once the cub attains its voice, the mother allows him to roar. Let's be humble. Strong and effective but humble. Humble  yourself before your God and He will lift you up. Own the nights and beware of the bats. Eat fruits with them but don't conform to their upside-down ways. Stay strong, stand tall. The fearlessness is in you. Believe you have always had it in you to conquer the world; then join me on safari, let's kiss the world.

Shortcuts & URLs

[Wizard Computers] Croxt:

I love me my laptops and when she's sitting on top of my lap. The glare is in my eyes and they are shaped like hearts and coloured red; emoji shit. So you can tell I've fallen in love with technology. Take knowledge with you wherever you go. It's the things that you know that open doors to the many that you do not. I apologize for the many people I've met who walk not making sense. I'm sorry. But mostly because some of you do not listen. It's in the knowledge that we are yet to know enough that we know more. I have seen "wise" people no more good than the people they led. Yes, some of them are convincing. Yes, some of them make sense. Yes, some of them believe they believe in something. Conviction. Yet I do not even blame them. We are nurtured in the environments we grow in. All of us. But my best typa people are the ones who unlearn the most lies they believed. You open your mind and mind your own business; yet creating a space of understanding. Mola akubariki. That's Swahili for "God bless you." So don't stress to impress. Find yourself and your progress will inspire the many others to fight to free themselves too. We are all heroes. I can't stress this enough. The weak ones got some power and money then obviously opted to increase fear and break the many who gave them the power. So I shun them. Don't destroy to increase yourself. You'll find yourself at the top with no foundation. I love technology, I won't even lie. Because everytime she sits on my lap, I get lost into the mad crazy world of internet. 

Press CTRL

[Wizard computers] Croxt:


Usually, I don't forget to pray. So, every time I wake up in the morning I smile. I bless my day then walk out alive to play. The discs are rolling and the disc jockey is feeling my vibe. Monsters for headphones and sucker for iPhones. Don't they say an apple a day keeps the doctor away? I'm healed. See, I put my pen on paper and forgot to watch my time. My leather shoes match my leather jacket and men of style like me are created for every season. Therefore I obviously have a reason for the things I say or do. I've seen people drop coins in the fountain at the mall to wish themselves well and the other day as I walked through to buy some stuff I barely needed, I saw the water cut and dry, and some random teenagers picking up the coins. I hope they put them into good use. Anyways, money is got to be spent or to be sent. We stack up what we have no use for. & I've come to believe the space in my computer is enough to save the world. That's why I try. And it takes some time of course. Uploading my battles online so people can download my victories into the files of their lives. Whizz kid they call me and Ojuelegba I'll respond. The 6 components of admirable shoes are hidden in the details. Details, details, details. They are the only things that have ever been ahead of their time. Yet ideas are born when we think beyond. Feeling small never grew anyone. So I build, I don't destroy. I never discourage my friends; I empower them. I give more and I guess that's why I receive more. I'm grateful above all and this clicks on my mouse are burning up my house. I know everyone is trynna stay sane and I commend all of you. Leave a comment and @ me in your mentions. Communication is important, I know, but I've chosen to stay silent some times. Things come and they go and I want you to show me the road to your DM's. Lead me; that's why I followed you. I walk with two torches, to light the way ahead of me and one behind me; to guide the people who are brave enough to trust in my steps. I got some songs illegally downloaded before it was even a big deal and I understand everyone is trying to make maximum profits; get maximum likes. I'll provoke your mind to reason and fetch for better reasons. It's when the river still flows that you can drink from it; and it's when the river is slow that you can swim in it. I want to be loved by you and I definitely have better reasons for it.

Tuesday 29 September 2015

Femme Fatale

[Morning Fires] Croxt:


Strike a pose, my lady, and steal my attention. I'm willing to pay it. To pay for it. Attention has never been expensive to me. And with like all the focus I've put into different things before, I'm pressing for returns. The blame game goes round in circles and they caught a squirrel spinning inside a nutshell. So I prefer never to summarize my ambition until I've seen it bear the fruits I craved for. Hunger pains and this hunger pangs I have have had me turning pages to seek a passage that would get my message. I am keen to the things I ought to be careful in. That's why I stopped taking advantage of the weak. I strengthen them instead. I've seen rose flowers dry up and lose their colour. I've also seen dry seeds become giant trees. It's all in due time. So I prefer not to waste my time on things that will pass. I press to increase and to give to Caesar what belongs to him. At the end of the road, when you've been cornered enough, you have to make a turn. & I believe all turns are good turns if they turn out well. So it's time-out for poverty and time-in for prosperity. All good things will come out to my favour if I go out to look for them. As much as I need strength and support, I've already built myself up to be a tower. Even for refuge to those who seek it. It's easier to be a light because at least you have a platform in the dark. Find the light in me that has me glowing. As she is a light so have you my friend beheld a glorious sight. She knows what she needs to do and she does it. To win she does and afraid she's not. She's a lamp that never runs out of fuel and the more trees she gets a hold of, the bigger the forest fire gets. So keep me a blaze and kill all that bothers me. I'm not fatigued but I figure these troubles could use some rest. Put them in their place and let's find a place together that we can both warmly and firmly embrace.



Monday 28 September 2015

Weed and Melodies

[Of seasons and change] Croxt:


Tap, tap, tap and the beat goes in like fire. We all know medicine only fights alone for those who take it. Some people have been sick and yet to know that they are because sometimes we miss the symptoms or ignore the signs. So I pray for your health that you may continue to grow stronger with every tide and fight easy in every trial. All will be well. The tunes in my head this evening have been lit and my unspoken desires have kind of been unsilenced. So now I have a melody in my head that I desperately want the world to hear. As far as this heart of mine beats and as close as this mind of mine thinks, I've realized that many have chosen to bracket their lives in and keep their dreams under a blanket, tucked in. What is worth the spotlight should be given its chance. And inasmuch as I've let my wings grow, I still know I have to train my muscles to flap them to my will and to the rhythm of my soul. I happen to be a curious traveller who doesn't really need company and even the skies bear witness; they know I can do this by myself. I have before found myself trapped inside a house of fire and smoke found its way in. Anguish. Then clouds of hope formed from my lungs and I somehow managed to breath out good music into the world. Sometimes, you need to know what you have to offer. What you can put on the table. Because we are all different.. some are greedy while some might be ungrateful. So I keep my cup full because I never wish to run out. I've had empty pockets before and the sun's heat scorched my back, me trying to please my bank. My temple got burnt and I've had to build another. My mother knows I long to go far and her prayers have kept me going. My sisters love me as I do back and my brother is surely a Prince on his way to become the King I believe he is. I bless the heavens. Have you seen that tonight the stars have aligned themselves to spell out my name? I'm glad I was patient yet unnecessarily, a little mad that I did not get here sooner. But you know, all is well that ends well. Sometimes it's worth the flight, sometimes it's worth the fight. You just gotta keep trying.

Broken beaks and scarred lips

[Of seasons and change] Croxt:


She told me, "Don't worry about it;" she told me, "don't worry, no more." So to be emptily honest, I can't feel my face when I'm with you, and I love it. See, sometimes we do not understand what is beyond us and that it's scary and that's scary. Because I'm picturing a bird flying towards a tall building with long glass windows reflecting a long way back from where she's flying from. Also, sometimes the breeze is so nice you gotta close your eyes and enjoy the feels. Plus you don't worry yourself too much because the reflection almost assured you that the way ahead was clear. So if you're reading this, it's too late.. the bird already crashed into the glass and she can't feel her face anymore. Not sure if she loves it. But we all heal through our imaginations. You treat your wounds in ways you come up with and a broken beak should never shut the words of your heart. We all need time. That's why I pray you give me time, I'm your man. I'll be right there when the tides fair our journey well. I'll kiss the broken beaks as you kiss the scars off my lips. We are all one and the things we fight the most are what we've both ever needed. So don't sorry and be happy. Don't worry about me in these times and work to better yourself. We met a bit sooner and now we've messed a couple of things up. Things we can fix. We don't need compassion, we don't need other people's mercy. I hope they don't feel bad for us and I hope we are not part of their conversations. I wish sometimes people could just sip some tea and mind their own business, sigh. Let's go to church and seek forgiveness. We have sinned. And I hope it doesn't disturb you beyond this. We have literally done the best we could and I couldn't be any happier for you. I'm so, I'm so proud of you! You're a winner dragged through the mud and the heroes we've been do not deserve to hide any longer behind a mask. So I sit here and ask myself, when are we going to do this again? It was nice to, nice to know yah.



Friday 25 September 2015

Hiroi Sekai

[Today's Heroes] Croxt:



Of heroes of the night and the daytime when there's light; the papers seem so bright and this mask hides the shine. So I don't want the spotlight on me but on my words and what they could make you believe. I'm alive and the best things I ever saw was the least things I'd ever need. See, I want to turn the world upside down and kiss it from it's toes. And my woes strangle my clothes and I think I'm getting too fat, the struggle is real and I could use some troubles. It's in the face of adversity that I could save a whole city. I'm still in university so it's hard for the distinguished to believe everything I say but, haven't you heard that the heroes of this world have been heroes since their births? But I won't make a big issue out of it; out of anything really. Hiroi Sekai; around the world, I'm headed. Hiroi Sekai; I'll change locations and cover them with peace. The clouds are all grey, and I'm gonna have a happier day tomorrow than I did yesterday. I'm ready for whatever and whenever the opportunity presents itself, I'll grab it's balls and by the bull's horns. Let it rain and let the rain wash away the pain. All I have is you and all I ever needed was you. So hug me tight and say my name in the rain. It's just you I've believed in and I hope you could believe in me too. Hiroi Sekai; it's a cruel world. Hiroi Sekai; let's laugh about the pain. Hiroi Sekai; I never paid my phone bill, and for the longest time, to be honest, so, they obviously cut my phone and left me in darkness. Hiroi Sekai; put on the lights, dead or alive. I'm expecting a call from my girl Duty and when she calls, you bet right I have to answer. Hiroi Sekai, let's take it to the world.

Thursday 24 September 2015

Hunilishi, Hunivishi

[Kiswahili Kitukuzwe] Kroxti:


Nashukuru nimeyaona mengi. Na anayewinda akipata hufurahi. Keti nikueleze yaliyonipata. Yaliyonijiri. Tajiri vyote anavyo na vilivyo hivyo ndivyo vipasavyo. Maskini hana lakini akipata shida zajieleza. Paza sauti uskizwe; binti mrembo mwenye sauti nyororo. Umenitia wasi tena kwenye pingu za ndoto letu hapo petu na ninalolitafuta zaidi ni jawabu. Yajibu maswali yangu na kwa utaratibu; nitibu yanitiyayo shaka. Nimeduwaa kwenye bahari la penzi lako ila ajuaye vipingo vya mtima wangu ataruzuku haja zangu. Sitathubutu kukupoteza ila kila wakati ufaao ni wangu wa kuuchukua. Tutasafiri tuondoke ulimbukeni na faraja zitakazotuandama zitatupata penye afueni. Tutacheza ufukoni tukiwa na pesa mfukoni. Wananitafuta hawanipati hawajui tuko mbioni. Si lenu, ni letu. Si lako, ni langu. Na asimamaye mbele ya umati tafadhali na aseme kitu cha maana. Kitu cha kweli. Tusiwapoteze wafuasi kwa kuwahifadhi ndani ya ulaghai na bila kuuweka ukweli mbali ya midomo zetu. Asemaye asikike; akikosa arekebishwe.  Umefungua pazia na ukanipata mwangalifu. Sikosi, sikosei. Walisema mtaka cha mvunguni sharti ainame na chini sana kwa kina chako mgongo wangu kwako ntauvunja. Nipe alama ya mshangao na nitakueleza mbona hatujafikia kikomo. Mwenda tezi na omo angalau amepanda meli. Ameuvuta upepo mwanana wa baharini. Na kizimbani akajipata bandarini. Kuwa wangu kipepeo na upae juu zaidi. Na kama mwewe, chochote kile kisikulemee. Nipe njia na nitaifuata. Nikipotea, nyuma ntarejea nijue nilipokosea. Wasafiri hawapotei na wakipotea wamesafiri kwingine. N'takushangaza. Nipe mwangaza niangaze njia yangu hata kwenye giza la kiangazi. Nimekuheshimu na hata kwa miaka arobaini, nitakupata ukiningoja. Saidia, saidia; jina lake Saida. Mtoto karembeka, taji kavishwa. Ninachohitaji ukiwa nacho, usinipe wakati mgumu kukipata, hata bila sababu.

Killy Billy

[Some of the Stories I tell] Croxt:


Killy Billy finally went uphilly today in Philly with Jilly and they were jolly all the way. Jilly is friends with Molly who couldn't hilly today because it was chilly outside and clearly she loves her healthy silly self dearly. Billy's dad earned billion billies and now they are richie rich and no one can bully Billy. They pay their bills. Billy's mum's name is Millie, short for Millicent, and she's earned every cent to the millies of millions she has in her banky banks. When Billy was small, he had a piggy bank and sometimes daddy would carry him piggy back and pat his back if he saved up enough for himselfie self. They had enough and Billy's Dad, Willy, taught Billy not to be a selfish self. He also taught him how to do things willingly. Like himselfie self. So today up the hilly hill went Billy and Jilly. It was kinda windy and chilly and really you could say Molly was brilly brilliant to stay at homy home. Billy and Jilly were determined so they dressed warmy warm and the coldy cold couldn't holdy hold any of them. Billy and Jilly wore glovy gloves that could hold the rocky rocks so they wouldn't slidy slide and slippy slip off. All the way while all the while Molly was home alone sleepy asleep. Milly had promised to pick them up after the hiky hike so she went early probably because the rally she attended ended early as well. Billy and Jilly were tired early as well so they retired and returned to the meeting spot just as Mummy aka Milly was parking in a spot on the parking lot. "Willy will be so proud of you Billy!" Milly said as she hugged her son Billy. "Of course, Mummy and guess what?" "What?" Milly asked. "I did it willingly!" Truly, you are your father's son Billy!


Wednesday 23 September 2015

You May Be Deceived

[Unnecessary Lies] Croxt:



The rich sophisticated girl with the Indian juice, would blow your mind. She was underatedly one of a kind. For everything around her beamed in her beauty and where she was from, seemed like a galaxy of untouched divine gloriousness. It was a mess to think ill of her. The glory of her beauty was blinding. Mr. Willow claimed himself the bravest and not too many disagreed. He had been sent to war and praises of his distinguished actions on the battlefield was taken with great admiration. Everybody heard  of his prowess and women looked at his pictures the way you'd look at a cute couple making out. So he was important and desired as well. And it's only fair if the best delight in the best and together, not necessarily. If kisses would lie then I'd bite my tongue because I've tasted her truth. Money talks and everyone was trying to befriend everyone who was a friend to Mr. Willow. But you don't have to listen every time money talks. It speaks big talk and little action. It thinks it needs to be desired so it pushes everyone lower to seem better. It's scared so it runs and escapes hardships like it escapes our pockets and wallets. So as we rise up I say a prayer. We are imperfect, all of us; that's why marriages like these seem to be made in heaven. Another fire. I admire the love that embraces their flaws and works relentlessly to better themselves and their lives. Mr. Willow obviously "won" the heart of the rich sophisticated girl with the Indian juice. But weak-minded men can't seem to possess things of value for a long time. Yet you don't hold things for a long time that make you feel smaller than who you exist to be. You let them go and so he said, "Goodbye, my love." - To the rich sophisticated girl with the Indian juice.


Tuesday 22 September 2015

Winter is coming

[Of seasons and change] Croxt:

The crevices open wider and swallow whatever is floating above it. The streams are sucked in and the mountains lose their high places. I'll look at the flick of your wrist and check the time. It grew its wings and flew away. So I'm rising to chase it and my guts believe I'll catch it. If you're too scared, go to church. You'll find solace there. And when you do, I pray it will give you the courage you need. Winter is coming and the winds have blown their warning trumpets. The leaves have fallen and the flowers are beginning to lose their shade. The cookie crumbles when you break it but somethings just happen on their own. So own up to the night with all your might and prepare your bed as you lie on it. Everyone believes in something and for me, I've made it bigger than myself, bigger than anyone I'll ever know. You need to big yourself up. It helps sometimes. We are one with the fire in our bellies and I really can't stretch enough my idea of freedom. It is hidden in peace and coated with everything nice. Everything falls right into the picture and the victors in the battlefield have mastered their art. I'm aggressive towards myself and that which I want. It keeps me pushing forward. I know where I'm coming from, the sun was out almost always and the breeze carressed my insecurities. Those are the days I chose to be stronger and it needs work so I put in what was required of me and went above and beyond to attain perfection, which I still am. Certain affections and uncertain desperations have created a curtain that has veiled my troubles and of course I'm grateful enough that the good Lord has never put me to shame. You don't have to understand me and everything I choose to do unless it makes you understand yourself and everything you've always wanted to do. There's a price to pay and it really is not expensive if you enjoy the ride all the way. The good times are coming for sure, even if they might have been hidden in struggle this whole time. It's when the sun rises that you realize the morning has come. So I'll wake up and stay up, say my prayer, take a cup of tea, brush my teeth, freshen up and take over the world. It's blinding, it's encouraging, it's brilliant, it's heartwarming, it's big and it's magic. Go ahead, prepare your taste buds, ready your belly and find your appetite soon because winter is coming.

Friday 18 September 2015

Give Me Answers

[Habits of Winning] Croxt:


Give me answers to the questions I've asked the most. I want to know, I intend to grow. I seek clarity and immunity to the things that plague this world. Dominion even in the shadows because sometimes you win even when they think you lost. I'm a servant in the quarters but my money is in the millions. People throw shade where they see the sun shining the most so I'm not surprised they could refuse to mention my name thinking they'd add value to it. Sharing is caring and you have some answers I hope we could share? Give me answers to the things that stir up my heart and to those that plunge it into hurt. Give me answers to the riddle of life, the puzzle of your heart and the mystery in your embrace. You are a whole universe by yourself and I, just an island somewhere deep in the Indian ocean, standing out. A refugee has walked more miles in his steps and the landmines have understood his woes and avoided his step. The next step on the radar is to look out for yourself. If you do find yourself, give me answers. There's some stuff I really wanna know. Like I know I'm the bomb and I'm gonna explode but really, when am I gonna blow? Let's claw our nails into the success we've dreamt of and if dreams are too big to some, give me answers why I've never doubted I was going to make it. I have a feeling we will do great, above and beyond. We are staring into our mirrors and starring in our own movies and it's sometimes towards the end that we find the answers we have been looking for. Yet, am not in a rush to figure everything out. I'll take one step at a time and if the directions ever get twisted and messed up or get changed, I've hidden the truth in my heart. Give me answers today I pray. Give me answers tomorrow to the questions I don't know and if I ever find myself in the dark and stranded, remind me sometimes that I too, could be the answer.

The Good Samaritan

[Habits of Winning] Croxt:


Habits of winning are developed then maintained. And sometimes, you win because you have no otherwise. You've been put down so many times it's almost impossible to keep staying small. The journey has its own battles and you're never sure when they will show up. So you keep walking no matter how hard it gets. You're worried about mama and your family needs stuff. So you get selfless sometimes and give your all. You have the platform so you use it to terminate the things that ill you. I'm a committed fan of the people who don't quit because other people made them. People who keep going beyond impossibilities and beyond onto the better things. I've been spilling secrets on dirty diary pages, even my own. I'm used to rapping on the phone still waiting for my break. Waiting for a good Samaritan to knock my door and take me to studio. I'll make them proud and I'll give the world tunes of hope to jam to. We have compressed ourselves and that's about not right. We are lifted and the robbers found us on our way to freedom. They stole our material possessions but I figure no one told them that hope was our biggest wealth. So right now, even if I lay down bruised and pass out to never return, I know this walk has been worth it. I've tried all I could and apologized for all the times I fucked up. We are travellers in a deserted city, a ghost town of undefined shadows. I'm the replica of something way bigger than me which I've connected the dots to realize it might be myself. I'll get my payment if that's what I deserve even if the people who I was convicted would help me have passed me by with a spit to my face. I've married the game and I don't want to break her heart. It's hard. At least it was, until you showed up and lifted up my spirits.

Joy Ride

[Habits of Winning] Croxt:


It's honestly a joy-ride and I haven't felt like this in a long time. Light up the candles and let the blessed smoke from their wicks rise us up to a higher occassion. I am unsatisfied by the number of drinks I have drowned tonight and I plead sobriety to the events ongoing in my mind. It's a lifetime of opportunities if you knock knock once and straight up open those doors. Then you don't waste time waiting for an answer and yet there could be no one inside. I'm no magician but I've tasted the salty tastes of luck and if you were to bet me to it, we would hit a rollercoaster of levels we haven't tuned into before. We are heroes, born winners. Even the children tonight sing the same silly songs we taught ages ago and some pages ago I wrote about how I kissed a girl and I liked it. It's tastes like these that might keep me awake at night but if she would look in the mirror from that day onwards she would believe she has always been beautiful because, yes, she has. And diamonds are mined only in the fields that were chosen before we gave them their worth. I'm super down to earth and I rarely brag the many blessings the good Lord has always granted me. I'm sane and feelings of remorse would drive me insane. So I seldom take some things seriously and it pisses off some people. I do not run head over heels for things that do not add value to my life. Don't you know that some of the best compliments are anonymous? Because then, they know that you need nothing from them. Still, you appreciate them, even from afar. I'm the head of a team that always wins and even if we lose, we lose in class. We win schools of admirers and now the mayor spoke to me about how he admired my courage. Let's call a spade a spade because the big spoons were tossed out last night. The anthem at the parade they played was written by me and if you still doubt I have touched the skies on one of my joyrides, then you should come with me.

Wednesday 16 September 2015

Too legit to quit

[Habits of Winning] Croxt:

The godfathers share our plight in the restructuring and reconstruction of our broken dreams and bruised hearts. Fallen bridges are often swept away by the rivers and it's because memories like these remind us that the grass on the other side might have been greener. It's enormously important that we organize our thoughts and forward our ambitions to the things that really matter. The tape recording must have missed a few scenes that we needed the most but you best do not want to construct your life on another's skeleton. We are all different and it still surprises me how hard we try not to be. I'm confronted by the imagination of a river that stopped flowing. What dried you? Whatever's gonna happen is gonna happen so I just do my job. The query I can't answer best is the question of time. I'm perplexed I've never stopped in my tracks even when I had every reason to. Maybe it's the priorities we set and the limits we set to beat. I'm unmoved by people's inability to see my worth. We are looking for our own. That's why the early bird rises to catch the worm and calm her storms. The stones people keep throwing my way pile at my feet and I didn't figure out for the longest time that you knew I needed a stepping stone. I can see a further distance from up here and the shadows y'all create have kept some in darkness. That's why when you are up and closer to the sun, you avoid blocking sunshine out of people's lives. And if you get too big to avoid it, you create your own source of light. Guide and direct. Show and illustrate.  Never frustrating yourself is hard if people have expectations in you. Also, not caring about what people think is making yourself an island. And no man is an island even if his foot is set on a high land. You bless those who bless you and pray for those who don't really know they need you. Shot three times and left for dead, unable to call an ambulance. Frustrating ambiance and drained ambitions. Fight for your passions till the Good Samaritan shows up, dresses your wounds as the Samaritan woman quenches your thirst. Don't stop unless it's at a stop light. It says stop and not final destination unless you have one right infront of your parking spot. So keep going till you reach home and when you get here, I'm dead-ass beat but I promise we will celebrate.

Uglinton

[Frames of Reference] Croxt:

So, nobody's ugly and if they ever were ugly, they are but only in your thoughts even if they were of yourself. So cheer up! You're beautiful in your own enigmatic way. Seriously.. You're beautiful. For the galaxies have lived in you since you were born and if memory would serve me right, I'd be right to say you deserve the respect every beautiful person deserves. Yet you sneak in disrespect into how you've treated others before and it fucks up your beauty. A challenge is well taken even if it's not well presented. You take all the bullshit and turn it into a mine of gold. Good things can always come out of that which we consider bad; & we've done this before, folks! See, I'm just a small flower in a garden full of different kinds. So what do I even know really, right? We are what we are but it doesn't mean we don't have to try. They say real men don't cry and I don't remember seeing one do that but I know for sure, because I'm one, that they worry to their bones. Sometimes, over the things that they shouldn't. Yet to fight everything that comes your way is absurd because it's sad to stress on less when you were meant for more. Look for more better reasons and solutions if it's to worry you choose and never lose your fighting spirit even when your fists loosen their screws. Stay out of your head sometimes and look out for other people. The people your heart wants to care about. Gather your courage and be the bestest version of yourself. I'm not saying you have to try so hard to impress but always make an effort, no matter how small. Move mountains even if you start with the little pebbles. The stream flows from above so how are you planning to quench the thirst of nations if you never attempt to ascend above whatever the society has defined you as? Leave them out sometimes. They say a lot of things. Which is fine to some point. But with constant draining, belittling, little inconsiderate actions towards you, ill talk and petty frustrations you deserve to light up the fire that will destroy their insecurities. Don't rub things into other people's faces unless it's shades of goodness. Don't push away the people you love before you've given them and yourself a chance to understand who you all are and their actions. Keep the lights on if they are scared of the darkness and stay by their side till the morning light has come. The alarm may set off and good morning beautiful, let's make today count ❤️

The Problem Child

[Frames of Reference] Croxt:


Unbroken cycles and repeated actions stir up unwarranted beliefs although I still believe, it's never that serious. Habits are second to nature because that's what we present. The problem with people, they'll always find a way to describe you through your words, through your actions and habits. I honestly do not have a problem with some of the things people say or do, but rather, with what these things mean to them and to the people around them.  What are you saying that is helping me? What are you telling me that I haven't heard before? Challenge growth and see the flowers flourish. The cherries I cherish delight my tastes and if it is to lick that which satisfies me, allow me to indulge. But I have a problem. I see so many problems. I point them out sometimes. And you're never really sure if correcting someone else will change them for the best or harden their hearts. It's a chance in the wind I've been willing to take. I've done enough work to see how everything works. I am not the one who got it wrong. You know I'm right. So even if I fight, I don't mind your subtleness just don't let that make you hate me. It's a no reason. I speak because I choose to express what I think and if my silence offends you, remind me why I started. Let's make jokes in any place we find ourself in and let's be merry. Why we take everything so serious, it's not nothing. We are enclosed in different spaces with different capacities. Tell me your story and I'll listen. I ain't got no type, I figure everything just how I like. Doctor my nights, treat my disorders and shed light to that which looks out of order. I'll do the same. If I ever impress you never feel intimidated. Feel glad and happy that you got to be part of our experience. Someone has to tell the truth and I admire your passions. I know we have things we miss and things we love love love to do. So do whatever it takes to be happy unless it bothers or harms the other. Build and don't destroy. Be and let others be without being blind to what grows around. I am a huge fan of development and if you're not trying to develop yourself and the way you think, let's just say I'll stay away.

"Terrorist" turned to Hero

[Frames of Reference] Croxt:


You're hiding something and once I find it out I'll show you why you didn't have to in the first place. I've been poor before, broke and broken, and I know that most poor people, all they cling to is hope. I wonder why that is. Some of them even lost that. So I'm guessing I could share my struggles and what I thought that we don't give a thought. The only help a poor person would get from you is in the VALUE of what you give them, if you ever choose to. I say value and it hits home sometimes and I say it other times and people don't know what it's worth. We think we've given too much sometimes but is that what they really needed? A sandwhich and some coffee, might never alleviate all the pain but sometimes too, it's really the most you can do. So give without denying yourself a smile of gratitude. Don't give for favours; that's called selling. Give for divine favour. You know? The one that grows you. & don't go out of your way to try and grow yourself you might detach yourself from your roots. You can always bless wherever you are. In your own way. People need different things and basically that's why I'm surprised beggars on the street turned into a business. You don't need to beg if you haven't tried all your means. The poverty mentality sucks the blood out of your ambition and I tell you, don't even try to fight your heart. It knows what it wants. When the doors of opportunities open, and it wants you to step inside, fuck fear and face whatever. It knows that that is what you've always needed. So rise above fear in all it's aspects and dimensions. Don't let the fear in others creep into you. Yes, be careful and real and true. Don't flaw information to bring things your way. I apologize for any erratic behaviour this society must have presented your way but don't you know that sometimes things come and they end? We are not slaves to our situations but to the thoughts of the things that keep us in them. To break free is to waken up and realize that you've always been bigger than that which troubles you. Problems have always been there and I'm not saying bad things will never happen to good people. But don't bring bad things to your good heart because they surely will come. Be driven by the ability to think and think big and no matter how small the bomb you carry in you might seem, you never know the impact it would cause on explosion, of the VALUE you add to this world, until you've acted enough to increase it.

Monday 14 September 2015

Trigger Fingers

Croxt:


Twitter fingers turned to Trigger fingers. 140 characters for a memorable tribute. Which, to me, is enough ammunition. See, torment is admirable from a distance and once immersed into its depths, you have to recall all those you admired who fought through it well and how they did it to survive through it all. For me, I have always admired courage, speed, strength, power, thoughtfulness, kindness, being considerate, ability to find happiness on your own, flexibility, peace and the ability to love above and beyond our differences. So yah, strength and power are two different things. Because with power you know you won't have to lose a drop of sweat sometimes. & for now. Power, you are accountable for while strength you might just as well depend on it. We imagine a lot of things and we are allowed just as much as we seek. Judged as much by what we speak. When we imagine, we build or destroy worlds and by then do we imprison ourselves or break the bonds that tie us. We have always been free. But what breaks us is even more so unseen. It's in our minds and it deceives us. It seeks to punish because we've "chose" our torment. But what if we could take all the pleasure minus the pain? What if we could breathe fire to our problems and make ashes out of them? Like they could try catch us but if we ran a bit faster, we could easily take off before anyone could grab and cut off our propellers. So we don't even seek shortcuts, they come to us. To those who wait. To those who practice patience. A light focused onto darkness expels it. We seek inspiration instead because victory only meets preparation & you kinda need to know when and how to keep moving when the going gets tough. It's funny how most of these things are not physical yet we torture the body for the pain in our hearts. An umbrella only covers the area under it from the rains and if it stings harder where it bit, throw the covers away and dance in the rains. Amplify your small voice and don't let anything look bigger than you. You are bigger than everything. You are a giant in the midst of everything you'll never fear. So walk with caution not to step on the small ones and move with grace so that everything might be at peace with you. It is well that you may be successful in everything you put your heart to do. So conquer the universe and still keep your soul. You don't have to lose it; you don't have to sell it. Look not for faults in others but build on the things they have that can make them better. Don't ignore those in trouble and could use your help. We become angels like this. Fear no evil even if you hear and see it. Make sure you also don't speak it. Our words are merely a reflection of the going-ons of our minds. Don't be troubled and don't seek trouble. What happens when your trigger-fingers become softer than some chicken fingers?

Sunday 13 September 2015

Umukhonto we sizwe

Croxt:

Burning spears can tear even the most untouched. The heat of the fire melts everything in the arrow's way and once it reaches its destination, it pierces its way into the the depths of the heart. So you can tell that the power of the pullback will drag it further the further back you pull it and sometimes we just have to be taken way back to surge forward into our situations. And, without overstepping the limits, of course. Be careful not to pull back too far till you're snapped out and don't pull back too weak or you will not reach the desired destination. I'll reintroduce myself on many occasions as the spear of a nation worth living in. You never know what you have until it has been released. But still, never regret. If it doesn't come back, go ahead and follow it. Look for it wherever you think it landed. You might find fresh meat in the process. If you can't find it, live on. Life is too short to own just one arrow. The hunt is large and the prepared ones find different ways to feed their families. I've thrown javelins a further distance into the unknown than Julius Yego would ever. So at the least, I know a few things. The prices in the market have risen and the economy is swallowing us whole. There's a hole in my heart and this emptiness I must go and fill. The garbage has surpassed the boundaries of our landfills because apparently, we cook more than we eat. Greedy? I don't think so. But maybe inconsiderate. Like, once we've had enough we're good. We throw away. We don't care enough for the next person. The next person might care enough for us but haven't we already built high walls enough to keep them out? Yeah. We hope for the best but we are not even the best ourselves. What makes us think we deserve even the little that we have? We haven't starved but also, we haven't helped those who have. So I share the little that I have, considerate enough even towards myself. You don't give away all you possess even to feel better about yourself; that never made sense. Sharing is caring and a random stranger staring at my food while I eat is scary. But we can laugh over my plate and talk some more about our fates. Meeting you must have been one of the greats because now that we've met, there's a reason for this. Let's figure it out together without wasting each other's time. If you can't help me then don't cling to me. I'll help where I can; I'll try whatever I can. In it all, I hope that we all win. I'll be the spear to your fears and please be my shield in the enemy's field.

Wednesday 9 September 2015

And then, it hits you

Croxt:


"Everybody's got plans.. until they get hit," if I could quote Mike Tyson. How I am a dreamer just like he was, having to dream and reach for the stars and if I was to ever miss a star, then I'd grab a handful of clouds. You gotta do, what you gotta do. Most importantly, what needs to be done. So before you step into the boxing ring, you ready your fighting gloves. Victory only meets preparation. Practice makes perfect if perfect is where you feel satisfied at and still able to step into combat. Pain creates survival yet you could never have known you survived if you never got to walk out of the torment and the fires that once consumed you. Grace. The fighter who boxes with grace gets very good at their job. And with their job, I say their pain. Even in the Bible he suffered. But with great faith, practice, patience, persistence and hope, you never lose a single fight. You throw deadly blows and gravely injure that which attacks you. You put it in its place. Inside the ring, you have to do whatever it takes to understand the other. You observe them in silence and let the pain you inflict on them make the noise. We are beyond being petty. If you can't stand up and be counted then keep sitting and watch your chances miss you. You don't see too far from far low there where you sit. I will be working the night-shift and at least can start paying my bills. I've caused pain to a few and it breaks my heart. Everything is possible and I agree we all need to work on ourselves. No one is really ever perfect. But if we breathe and speak peace, tomorrow's covered. No one really has to worry. When we respect each other, we respect the order and disorder of all other things. We create peace. & when it hits you, make sure you stepped inside ready and prepared enough to win and clench the title in the first round.

Thursday 3 September 2015

A Train of Refugees

Croxt:


Isn't it terrifying to imagine that we are all not the same? Or don't go through the same situations for that matter? I have a train of thoughts and woes, running through my mind and I imagine we all know for those who've been one, you're never really trained how to be a refugee. It just happens. You're never really ready. So you have to run and run for your life. Leaving most things behind. And the ones who stand to profit claim victim sometimes or pretend not to be involved. They shift blame and they attack in the pretense of helping. The hand that feeds should never be bitten. And it's unfortunate if the hand does not know it's not supposed to be bit. That it can fight back. So they play games. On each other. For power. Those who deserve power are those who rise in their courage to do right in the face of so much darkness, not the ones who rise up by inflicting pain and fear upon others. To intimidate and belittle others for the money power you have is to defeat the strength hidden in thought. See, the stage of power on play today shows skewed priorities. They run for the worthless and sometimes skip over the most worthy. The good does not force itself onto others and things. It only walks into welcoming warm embraces. The evil pastes itself wherever. "Like me, like me, like me" -even if you're unlikeable? "Yes, yes yes. Even if I'm unlikeable." Haha. But on a serious note, when they play these games sometimes it's all a scheme of plots. Someone creating problems and tragedy for others just to reach to his selfish goals. Let's not lie to each other. We are all human and we have to respect each other, all BiaS aside. Everyone deserves to be respected. But treat also the one for the evil which they create. Correct them, show them, make them understand. If they do not change their ways, strip the power off of them. We are all now fighting even from the smallest bits of our existence, to be equal or better. Different people want different things. And the refugee wants and seeks solace. A new place to hide away from home. A new place to sleep for home is no longer an option. Even if there's need to boat to the next safest land. Even if it means losing your wife and kids to a capsizing boat. F*. The waves know no tragedy. Walking miles on top of miles to run away from terror. Wounded, blistered, tired, afraid. It's never fun. Some running away from running bullets. Tell me how fast and lucky you gonna have to be for that one. Bombs dropping like everyone's making a mixtape. Crying babies carried behind on the women's backs and others wrapped on their father's chest or little legs dangling from his shoulders. Hungry. Terrified. Hoping not to step on a landmine. I think they were called that to signify just that. "I own this land now, it's mine, so run for your lives." I have immense disgust for greed. Greedy people are impatient people and impatient people stumble often unnecessarily. And in their grief of stumbling they plot evil ways of making a comeback. Tell them this is not a game. We have had more than enough pain. Remind them that a train full of refugees was stopped halfway and all of them were kicked out. What are you gonna do? Lie down on the tracks? Yes yes yes yes they did. Nowhere else to go. Show some mercy and have some compassion. Prepare your arms and welcome them home even if it's now home far away from home. They did not plan for it. They do not deserve it. Turn your energy to the ones causing this havoc. Condemn them. Put them to light. Fight for what is right. They are to blame if anything. The ripples cover a larger distance than expected no matter how small the pebble is. The evil decisions of others affect even the good so protect the weak. Remind them often the sun shines on those who choose to step up to the plate. You don't need to stay in the shadows for too long. Know where you've come from, what you didn't like and what is worth fighting for. Speak for the voiceless and see your dimensions grow bigger. Let yourself run free in the tracks and set the train full of refugees free ❤️

Tuesday 1 September 2015

Respon6ixibility

Croxt:


Respond to your situations as they present themselves. Right now, I'm holding my bottle of Hennessy, drowning in some petty situations I'm yet to put a finger to. Hennessy V.S Cognac is pretty decent, but I would much rather have my Courvoisier. The emblem of a team worth cheering for can be tarnished, this I know. So I guard my heart and take care wherever she needs to go. I'm down on one and heroically throws my fist in the air. You know you are winning if you can't remember the last time you lost. A shit ton of work to address and her dress is on the floor, I, being caressed. Her hair undresses my scent senses and I can't recall the last time I was this impressed. The crowd roars in exhilaration galore. Ecstatic chants and wild songs. They sing today as if tomorrow is a dream come true and yesterday a blur in the distant far. My ego has learnt its place and it stays in check. I never let things like these crowd my mind. I've almost mastered greatness. You know you've started from the bottom if you've reached a height you can't look down upon. So you create a path even unwillingly because those footprints of hard work and pain do not just rub out that easy. Greasy. Uproot the weeds from your garden and water it with praises and good vibes. Grab some popcorn and watch the flowers bloom like they wanted freedom so bad. It's that unprescribed bliss. You kiss the lips that are ready for you and shut the ones that choose to speak evil. You decorate your heart with glad tidings and festoon your mind with beautiful hopes. Don't let the artificial things choke up your happiness, you're better off far away from conceit. Humble yourself and glow your true self. Don't force things, even the ponytails. Even that wedding. Don't do beyond you to earn praise. Do it for yourself. Nike. Just do it. & do it nice. The pressure helps us grow and if we're strong enough, we don't explode. So chug this bottle to the last drop and fight back against the inaccuracies. Let your judgement be flawless and your arguments credible. If it's not true, if it's not kind, if it's not nice, if it's not necessary; don't say it.